This months'
Jazz Joke:
A trumpet player swaggers about
his skills to the band leader: " I play as loud as Louis Armstrong,
as high as Maynard Ferguson, as fast as Dizzy Gillespie, and as
cool as Chet Baker." After his audition the band leader says:
"I wish you were as dead as Miles Davis."
A replacement trumpet player was rehearsing for
the first time with a big band famous for playing unusual and complex
arrangements. On looking over the charts he saw that all the pieces
were in uncommon time signatures such as 7/4 and 11/8. Turning to
the trumpeter next to him he asked: 'Hey man, what are these? Hat
sizes?'
'Man,' replied the other, 'Tell me about it! The only time this
band plays in 4/4 is when we play 'Take Five'!'
How do trumpet players traditionally greet each
other?
"Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm better than you."
A jazz trumpet player working as a substitute in
a classical orchestra had a 32 bar rest. On the 33rd bar he failed
to come in which caused the conductor to stop the rehearsal. 'Why
didn't you play?' asked the conductor'
'It says here in the part that I've got to take a 32 bar rest,'
replied the trumpeter.
'I know that, but we were at bar 33 and there you must play. You
have to count.'
'Man, that's not fair.' complained the jazz musician. 'If I have
to count what kind of a rest is that?'
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